Ups and Downs 7/28/17

So, I DO have my ups and downs.  Something might trigger a negative thought and I spiral downward into a deep dark place depending on the thought.  I have spiraled so far down that I felt like I was gonna vomit or my insides were just hurting so much that I thought I would explode, or I cried so hard that I thought I wouldn’t have anymore tears left or even wanting to just die…yes, I have been there.  I was there yesterday for a little bit.  I was putting rhinestones on a bandana for an order and a song came on that triggered me.  I fell to the floor, my heart was in PAIN and I was crying uncontrollably.  I asked God to PLEASE send something or someone to help me get away from these feelings because I didn’t want to go deeper into them – then BING!  I heard the ding of my FB messenger and at first I ignored it then I was like “maybe that’s it” and I got up to look at it. 

It was my ex husbands aunt sending me a video where a lady was talking about going through situations to get to your destiny – the process!  GOD WAS ON TIME! This is the second time I was on my floor in my room recently asking God to do something and He did – fast!  I was wanting to give up and this video she sent was a REMINDER of why I won’t!  And even though I feel “lonely” at times because I “feel” like I am by myself going through all of this because I THOUGHT I was going to go through it WITH someone specific, I KNOW that there is MORE to all of this than what I can “see” at the moment – and I know it is GOOD!  Sometimes you will HAVE to be qualified and set aside to be able to learn to handle what is waiting for you because it is a bigger responsibility than what you are used to AND sometimes people, things and situations will have to be removed from your life so God can get your FULL ATTENTION.  God WILL show you and mold you IF you ALLOW Him!  He WILL put the people and things in place for you that are necessary for you to get you to the next level!  BUT you also have to do YOUR part!  It’s not ALWAYS easy, but it’s ALWAYS worth it!!!!  

Thank you for reading and following me during this process.  As I am sharing MY experiences, I hope to inform, inspire, motivate and maybe even entertain at times – like I was when I saw someone else share their story.  There is SO much more to come!  You can keep up with me on fb, twitter, instagram and youtube, also!  

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